yesterday was hellacious; today i have hope

i am back home! and by home, i mean far, far away from my family. but damn do i love it here. i can't believe i'm back. helloooo, sarah lawrence, dream school! i'm a total convert this year, a starry-eyed acolyte if ever there was one. (see, it's already better for my vocabulary - or maybe that was the tom robbins novel i just read. i love that man.)

after getting my room key, my first move was to go see my room, completely empty, before i moved anything. i loved it. not the actual room, but the space, utterly to myself, my own. my desk is funny, i keep trying to think it's retro. i have only three drawers, which are smallish, which means i need to relearn how to use a hanger. i wish i had more energy right now, but life's been nonstop (pretty much literally) since saturday. and mana comes tomorrow. maybe i should just start doing crack. or give up on a normal schedule til next week.

i saw both my ex-roommates' moms before i saw my ex-roommates (actually, i still haven't seen audge, just bridge - their nicknames are funny - because we have to feminista-plan).

current events:
i got a pedicure and it was awesome. i would whore myself for those before massages. do i speak sacrilege? do i care?
i finished packing literally as i was walking out the door, after 2.5 hours of sleep.
no wonder i forgot the vital SLC paperwork and we had to turn around in the middle of the interstate.
my first (8:00 am) flight was canceled. so, after 28 minutes and 4 seconds on the phone fixing it (about 27.5 minutes of which was spent on hold), i got to wait around the alb airport for TWO HOURS waiting for my new flight to take off and eating things i would never eat under normal circumstances. that is lame, lame, lame. i ended up landing FOUR hours later than i was supposed to. suck suckity suck suck. so i did not eat or sleep well or anything on sunday, and it made me grouchypants. then i slept for six hours and got up and lugged all my shit across campus. no wonder all i want are fluids and a nap. i don't even really want chocolate, because it will make me thirstier. this is unheard of.

speaking of being thirsty, it is about 1000% humidity here, a feature i'd blocked out of memory. i wonder if the GW boys have melted yet, high altitude creatures that they are. they should come visit in cooler weather so they aren't all stinky. but they should come visit. actually, just thomas, he's way more fun. i like him way more than he likes me; that is unhealthy.

the east coast smells like home. smells live in the reptile brain, the primal part. like the smell of my mom. i accidentally caught her scent as we were saying goodbye on friday and i wanted to cry and quit work and just hang out with her. but the smell of damp grass, and humidity, and pavement and highway - the smell of new jersey and new york (not the city, the city smells like intimidation) - that's home. it makes me feel like a little kid.