the past 24 hours ago*

24 hours ago, i got back from babysitting Liam, all ready to settle down with my Incredibly Depressing Book for the evening. the phone rang. i hadn't been expecting to hear from him, as he was involved in SLC's 24 hour play festival (playwrights show up, get topic, start writing, hand over script 12 hours later to actors and director, who have 12 hours til it goes onstage - pretty fucken cool).

he comes over, somewhat drunk, and we talk and make out and cuddle and make out some more and we shower and decide to go to the pub and come back and we negotiate some boundaries, we go to bed, we play with each other, i make good choices and bad ones. i'm still not sure how i feel about certain things, some of which are and are not his fault. we close our eyes at 5 a.m. and he leaves at 7 a.m. for his half of the play festival (directing/acting). he calls me an hour and a half later so i'll wake up for work. i perform poorly at prospie day due to lack of sleep. a fellow admissions worker pulls me aside to tell me she had spoken with boy before he broke up with his girlfriend - that he should wait awhile after they broke up, etc.

this makes me feel like an asshole. they've been broken up for a week about, ooh, tomorow. he and i need to have the several conversations we've been avoiding. damn.


*wow, i just re-read the title. i AM tired! i think i'll leave it.
**i'm not sure anyone reads this anymore, but 'sokay, i'm basically just keeping a record for myself at this point, i guess.